Thursday, December 1, 2011

Comforting our Children

My second child is the one who I sympathize with most. She's also my greatest challenge. She's a deep thinker; quick - witted, and exceedingly sensitive. She's a fiercely loyal friend yet a strong introvert.

There are days when she is such a joy with her funny remarks and her thought-provoking questions. But, this afternoon was not one of those. She seemed content enough when I picked her up from school. And after we left the library, she eagerly requested to carry out her book from the stack. But, when we arrived at home, I had a different daughter.

She yelled at her little sister for coming into the room. She called names. She refused to listen to calm reason. I had to leave the room in frustration so that I could cool off. Goodness. What to do? - The only thing a desperate mother can do. I asked my husband for back-up and I prayed for wisdom. After a dinner strewn with unkind words and plenty of food left on the plate, she left in a huff - back to her room. And then, it dawned on me.

I recalled the words I had read this morning and thought about how I could bring her comfort. I peeked my head into her room and asked, "would you like to take a bath in my tub with the good-smelling bath salts?" INSTANTLY, she became a different child. Back to her sweet, kind self - she climbed into the tub. I set out her pajamas, robe and slippers; brought her book into the bathroom and told her that she could stay there and read as long as she liked. As I took her precious face into my hands I remarked, "Dear one, did you need a night alone?" "Yes." "I understand, I need nights alone, too. Do you think that next time you feel like this, you could calmly let me know that you need some time alone?"

And that was that. Good-golly, I hope that I can remember the next time this girl is acting like a crazy person, that she's a young lady who needs her space now and then - just like me. A dear friend of mine once said, "It doesn't take much to bring us back around, a little chocolate, a glass of wine, a warm bath and we feel like a new woman."